Write Lightning is a blog from writer Deb Thompson.
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(Some links or topics may not be completely kid-appropriate.)

Wed, Nov 09 2005

Taking Shots For At Bird Flu

Corporations who make their profits based largely on food products of the feathered variety are having to prepare for the worst. KFC is ready to roll out a series of TV spots if they have to calm those who are afraid that some bird flu-contaminated chicken poses more of an immediate health risk than the artery-clogging chicken some customers already consume on a daily basis.

Soon we'll be misty-eyed and nostalgic, looking back to a time when we had no need for things like "sentinel chickens". I wonder. If an animal activist group feels sorry for a sentinel chicken and sets it free will this be considered fowl play?

And who knew we could all have been making a killing (if you'll pardon the expression) buying stock in companies that produce sauerkraut and kimchi, both of which have been touted as possible bird flu curatives?

Will Chicken Little and The Little Red Hen be placed on the banned books list? Will people finally stop putting pink flamingoes on lawns?

Maybe children will be treated to gentle public service announcements from Sesame Street's Big Bird. And will tabloids rush to smear cartoon icons such as Looney Tunes star Foghorn Leghorn? Will Disney's beloved Donald Duck choose to go by the single name of Fauntleroy (his middle name)? Will the past controversy of naming sports teams Redskins pale in comparison with the idea of referring to team members as Falcons, Eagles or Ducks? Will children named Robin or Jay become easy targets for schoolyard bullies? Will those Brady Bunch reruns seem even more innocent and playful now when aired opposite the likes of the dark-sounding Partridge Family?

Will aspiring politicians avoid photo opps with once-esteemed Senator Robert Byrd? What about the obvious disadvantage of a politician having a last name like Hatch? And has anybody besides me noticed all the trouble surrounding a certain U.S. representative whose last name just happens to be DeLay?

posted at: 12:04 | category: /Playing | link to this entry

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Stealin' copy is as bad as horse-thievin'
and cattle rustlin'! Lightning may strike
such varmints when they least expect it!